this time, as i pack my stuff into my all consuming, seemingly pitless, weight-absorbing rucksack, preparing for my return to bijapur, aside from the pre-work, post-holiday blues, i do not feel any anxiety about what i will forget to carry with me or what i will reach and then realise i havent brought with me, that essential piece of trivia that i definitely couldve done with. i am relaxed. i have realised one thing, thank god, that i do not NEED anything. a pair of clothes that fits, my stethoscope (Tintu, for future reference), my camera, running shoes, toothpaste, cash, identity card, earphones. oh, underclothes (mom would cringe that this is an afterthought). everything else is peripheral, could easily be done without, is not irreplaceable. living in a place like bijapur, meeting the kind of people that i do, watching them live in a forest in the middle of nowhere, with, really, much less than whats in my list of essentials, these tribals arent unhappy, or ill equipped to face anything that they come across. i find myself wanting to do more with less. it has become as if, a fun exercise. oh, i do not have this, hm, what can i use instead? this leads to less baggage ( imagine all the heavy meaning implied by the word baggage), fewer attachments, minimal airport time, no loading off and on the bus anxiety, and a general look of dis-approval from my mother who reminds me every time that once i come back to ‘civilisation’, i must transfer my loyalty to suitcases. i am, at this point, tempted to launch into a tirade about what ‘civilisation’ really means, and whether i am coming away from it or going into it, and whether its a good thing or bad, but lets save that ramble-in-the-busy-market for another day. meanwhile, i do not know how long this weightlesness, gravity-nullifying, freedom-setting endeavour will last. i hope its one of those life long unshake-able habits one develops from the field. its a lesson that has hit me late into my field journey, that so many have arrived at so much earlier, but i am determined to revel in the feeling.
p.s. i think i forgot to mention my box of ear-rings. thats my vice. one must look good in a mirrror/stream/rear view mirror irrespective of geography. no?
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